Not the norm: A quest to “adulting” differently


By Maria-Paula  


Julie Lythcott-Haims, a New York Times bestselling author has again shaken the literary space with an incredible guide to adulting. In the book “Your Turn – How to Be an Adult”, the author talks about her experiences growing up. She accompanies this with practical life situations of the people she interacts with. Her diverse and inclusive work can have an overall impact on every adult in society regardless of their age, sex, race, belief, or even social standing. 


Adult readers can resonate with the fact that they don’t have to follow the orthodox adulthood pointers of finishing education, getting employment, leaving home, and finally marrying and having children. Instead, it is fine to graduate from college with your spouse and children, and colleagues planning that achievement party to celebrate you!

This book is a reflection of what people live through daily. Lythcott-Haims aims to awaken in parents, this century’s realities. It’s great to consider that this 40-something author and her 20-something son are in a similar place. Both trying to figure out what to do with their lives. Parents can walk their life’s journey and achieve their dreams at their own pace for themselves and the people around them.


Although this is a hefty book, containing 400+ pages, many case study examples, and a mirage of diversions from the main topic, this author still manages to deliver her message. The writer reminds the audience that no matter how much parents can get clingy against letting their children be independent adults, the time for all grown-ups to stand on their own is inevitable. This she explains well in the “fending” subtopic as “Fending means being responsible and accountable. It means you seek the thing – the job opportunity, the apartment to rent, the medication refill, the groceries to make a meal, the jack for the flat tire, the info on how to pay your taxes – and you find it and make something of it rather than waiting around to have the thing handed to you or handled for you by someone else.” 


Though she speaks from the American perspective, her ideas are easily transferable to other industrialized cultures. One of the book’s greatest points is that readers can learn how to better understand their young adult children, friends, and colleagues. It is a great approach to guiding the young generation through life’s transitions by ensuring they remain accountable for their actions. 


In “How to Be an Adult”, emerging adults defend their non-traditional lifestyles to those outside their generation. Equally, just like in her previous book “How to Raise an Adult”, Lythcott-Haims outlines the use of practical methods by encouraging young individuals on their independence and parents against overparenting.


The book, published by Henry Holt and Co. is now available at a local bookstore near you as of April,6,2021.


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